Washing Money

All day Friday was spent on the phone to the UK, to the bank and travel companies, it sounds glamorous but the reality of it was far from exotic.

Having to organise cash extractions and international currency exchanges with a British banking system that cannot help with your exchanges, and systems that will only allow certain amounts of money to be changed can give one a rather big headache.

In Algiers we work in cash only, we buy dollars we then exchange them for Dinar, the problem comes when you don't have any dollars because we have yet to find an ATM that works, even in the airports they are out of order, so I spent the day on the phone with my lovely bank organising and reorganising how best to get my wonga, I would love to know how in the movies you see people with suitcases full of money because I couldn't even get a bumbag full, well that is not strictly true I could get a shed load of pounds but that currency does not work in Algiers it was the dollar, dollar, dollar was what I need.... I spoke with numerous ladies and gentlemen all of them extremely helpful, but no one could help me with one transaction, so my bank informed me of my best options, this entailed me taking either cash or chip and pin and going from travel store to travel store to collect the money I needed.  You can imagine how stressed I was feeling by this time, but there was nothing I could do about it and the bank were unable to assist with the money exchange, apparently they don't work in large sums of travel money!!!!

So I ordered my own money from my wonderful Scottish Bank to be delivered to a Halifax branch somewhere I knew not where but I had the address on a slip of paper, I then organised transactions from certain travel shops that could assist me, wrote that on my slip of paper and I was ready to leave on Saturday, not happy but ready.

I landed at Gatwick and decided to take out cash from the travel store next to the baggage reclaim, a word of advice to my traveling friends NEVER take money out at baggage reclaim, they were amazingly helpful with all the problems that I had which will become apparent soon, and they gave me lots of dollar for my pound but I think Ali Ba Baa was there name as the exchange rate was so poor that I think I actually funded the staff christmas night out! Never mind I had a pocket full of dollars and was feeling very happy, they even let me use their phone to call my driver as the transaction was taking an age.

I left Gatwick and attempted to find my driver in his white Mercedes, when all around me were black cars, all kinds of black cars, but luckily for me this lovely 6ft tall African gentleman who was I believe the traffic warden for the airport took pity on me, and loaned me his phone to call my driver, what a lovely man to take pity on an inappropriately dressed fruitcake looking bewildered and cold, I was only inappropriately dressed due to the flimsiness of my attire, there is not much stopping that cold getting through a dress made of net curtains....

I arrived at Lou Lou's house and then it was off to meet the family, two new babies have been added to our numbers over the last few months and I was needing snuggle time, there really is nothing better than a snuggle with a newborn, or a giggle from a nearly newborn, I had both over the course of the next few days, I was even vomited on, so now I know I am loved... it wasn't even a little spit this was full on puke right through to my undies, and I had to borrow a rather fetching Ralph Lauren T-shirt from my nephew because there was no way I could go shopping in my wet clothes, the bra had to stay as the nephew doesn't wear them!

Anyway back to the money problem, my first refusal came on Sunday.  Having left the UK in 2012 our post is redirected to Lou Lou, but I decided to change my bank not the beloved's just mine to Lou Lou's address, BIG MISTAKE, this now meant that my drivers id and one form of photo id was not in sync with my bank account address, I had never even thought about it before, well until I tried to get out more of the lovely dollar and was eventually refused because of the differing addresses, I could have cried because I had only the day before taken out the dollar from Ali Ba Baa with no problems, so I came away empty handed and downtrodden and headed back to Lou Lou.

Little Bro collected me and transported me across to his for the next few days stay, we had a glorious evening in the Shampan indian restaurant, Debbie and Gel also joined us and chatted away about all things that seem relevant to table chatter, like automatic doors in London toilets, and when you forget to lock them, to dodgy toilets in foreign countries, what a nice family I have. 2am and rather a large amount of alcohol later it was time for bed, I am only grateful I didn't partake of that falling down juice because I had to wake the relatives the next morning as they had slept right through their alarm, oh and it was not pretty by any stretch of the imagination....

My taxi driver arrived and drove me to the Halifax branch to collect my wonga, and the fantastically helpful gentleman who in fact was the same gentleman I had spoken to on Friday when I ordered my cash helped me with my transaction, he also helped me change my address back to my Scotland address, so all my id's now are fully in sync and I will never ever do anything that silly ever again, I hope.

I had an escort now in the form of Jack Lou Lou's step son, I have no idea how tall this lad is but he is the type of lad you would not want to tackle on a rugby pitch, or even upset in a dark alley so I felt quite safe walking around with my money parcel, we blethered about all sorts, took a little lunch and then headed for M & S and they were fantastic with my next transaction, everything went like clockwork, then it was back to Lou Lou's then more baby cuddles and collection for my return to Little bros', conversation was pretty monosyllabic for the rest of the evening and an early night was required for the drinkers who had struggled through all day with their feelings of 'woe is me' and 'never again', well until the next time. We have all been to that dark, dark place but it's when you forget how dark it is and you venture back in, that is when the problems begin.

My beloved now has decided to fly into Gatwick and fly out again to escort me and share some of the pain of carrying large amounts of wonga, so now I feel a little more confident but only a little...poor guy doesn't even get to leave the airport grounds, now that is love.

This has been a stressful trip, but also it has been a great trip, I have caught up with all my gorgeous nephews and their respective better halves, and all the beautiful babies and children, I have seen Lou Lou, Rob, Jack and Sam, even had my own body guard. I have seen Dave, Dee, Debbie and Gel and it has been for the most thoroughly enjoyable, although sometimes I think enjoyable and family are two words that don't always go hand in hand, sometimes mental and pedigree can be more appropriate!

Eggs Florentine no muffin but plenty of bacon
and delicious it was too from Loch Fyne Bluewater